Apparently, not all of India’s excellence lies in the past, as this stout motherfucker is currently the head of England’s kabaddi team, which seems to be a combination of kill the cow, wrestling, and marco polo.  Quite frankly, the rules don’t make much sense to me other than the fact you have to hold your breath if you have the ball and players kick the fuck out of each other.  Think I’m joking?  From Wikipedia: “Two teams occupy opposite halves of a small swimming pool / field and take turns sending a “raider” into the other half, in order to win points by tackling members of the opposing team; then the raider tries to return to his own half, holding his breath and chanting the word “Kabaddi” during the whole raid. The raider must not cross the lobby unless he touches any of his opponents. If he does so then he will be declared as “out”. There is also a bonus line which ensure extra points for the raider if he manages to touch it and return to his side of the field successfully.”  As I understand it,most kabaddi players begin as pehlwans, as wrestling is an integral part of of the sport, and their strength training is similar.  Thus, Indian strength training methods would seem to still produce some impressive results.

Stout as shit.

The jacked motherfucker above who appears to be the essence of all of the badass Indian gods rolled into one is Manga Mithapuria, a man who stands as living proof of the efficacy of Indian strength training methods.  It stands to reason that these methods should produce results like those shown above- Indian wrestlers utilize training methods honed over nearly a thousand years of fanatical devotion to strength and muscularity.  Thus, in spite of their current inability to compete on the international level in strength sports, their methods, exercise, and programming deserve far more investigation and respect than the West gives them.  Frankly, as the West typically pays India and Indian athletes about as much respect as the typical Romanian pays an unwashed Gypsie, any amount of respect paid the Indian training methods would be an improvement.   Given what you’ve already learned about Indian weight lifting in this series, it should come as no surprise that the Indians get up to some Howard Hughs-esque weirdness with the rituals and traditions surrounding training, though they seem to refrain from collecting fecal samples and storing them in labelled jars.  They are, however, concerned with a wide array of seeming trivialities that to the Indians are of paramount importance, and after delving into their odd predilections a bit deeper, they actually happen to make sense.

Kicking off the weirdness is the preoccupation with cleanliness.  Before entering the gym, one must have taken a leak and a shit, taken a cold bath in the summer or a warm bath in the winter, and brushed their teeth.  Amusingly, the first action on the list has special importance, as the Indians truly believe that they must urinate to relieve the body’s inner heat before bathing, or risk “enrag[ing] the body and caus[ing] serious illness”(Alter) and that entering the gym without shitting could destroy the purity of the gym, ostensibly guessing that you’ll shit yourself in training and dirty up the place.  As for the bathing, Indians have a laundry list of reasons why they should bathe (especially a cold bath) before lifting, but the list basically boils down to the fact that it wakes you the fuck up and sets your mind for doing work.  As such, it makes sense to get all polar bear on the deal and freeze yourself in a cold bath before hitting the gym.  Additionally, cold baths have been shown to increase testosterone levels, improve sleep, boost your immune system, reduce depression, increase fertility, increase energy, and reduce the effects and incidence of injury (McKay).  Thus, the Indians are off to a good start, even if their rationalization for the bath is a little odd.

Past the bath, Indians have some other oddities that are worth examining if for no other reason than they might lend themselves, with modifications, to your daily routine.  First, they always rub themselves down with the dirt from the wrestling pit to remove perspiration and keep their body warm post workout.  This is done to prevent the “chill” that folk medicine tells us will bring on illness.  Once they’ve cooled down, they bathe again, then rub themselves down with oil to facilitate self-massage and to keep their skin from drying out.  As all of us know, self-massage is a pretty much essential part of recovery, so the Indian predilection for post-workout rubdown and dirt extravaganza makes sense.

I’m not gonna suggest you do so, but if you were to self massage to this scene from Texas Chainsaw 3D, no one would blame you.

Once the Indians have completed their sixth to eighth hour of training for the day and drunk their liter of ghee, it’s time to hit the sack.  Sleep is paramount for Indian lifters, as they consider it equally important to food, air, and water (Alter).   They believe that it’s essential for recuperation, helps with digestion, and allows lifters to get stronger.  They attempt to sleep at the same time every day, keeping the body’s natural rhythms in sync and optimizing hormone levels.  According to the Indians, a “lack of sleep produces illness, emaciation, weakness, impotence, and the risk of premature death” (Alter), which while a bit extreme, generally falls in line with what modern science has shown us to be the case with rest and recovery.

Skeptical George is skeptical.

To build on the recovery they get from sleep, the Indian strongmen also set aside Wednesdays for massage, foregoing training for full-body massages.  This allows them to train with the level of frequency and intensity they do- pretty much anyone who’s training six to eight hours a day, three of which is strength training, are going to need a massage on the regular.  The wrestlers themselves give each other the massages, and many of them are highly knowledgeable in joint manipulation as well, so that they act as combination masseurs and chiropractors.  The key, they feel, is to become as knowledgeable as possible in all aspects of maintaining and improving the health of themselves and others, to facilitate harder and heavier training and thus become incredible athletes.  Frankly, this all seems like a fucking great idea, and I’ve been in gyms wherein knowledgeable members will throw out quick massages and adjustments for other lifters, but it seems we have far too much sexual taboo and repression in the West to really make full use of this method.  As such, you might just want to utilize your Theracane and Rumble Rollers for a while once a week to avoid having to mumble “no homo” repeatedly while having your lifting partner try to grind out your trigger points himself.

This picture should inspire the suicide of just about everyone on Reddit, since I guarantee you this motherfucker’s never spent a dime on supplements or a minute blathering on a message board begging idiot strangers to critique his routine.  

The Meat And Potatoes… Finally

So much goes into Indian strength training, given the Indians’ remarkably holistic approach, that at some point you wonder where the fuck lifting actually fits into their regime.  As I’ve stated, they actually do a hell of a lot of lifting, clocking in a solid 18 hours over the course of a week.  Strength training is referred to as Vyayam in India, and is intended to simultaneously develop strength, hypertrophy, and flexibility.  Though I’ve sort of covered this in the introduction, there are twelve rules to vyayam to which strength trainers are supposed to adhere to get the most out of their training (Alter):

  1. One should arise before dawn, defecate, bathe, oil oneself and go to the akhara.
  2. At the akhara tie on a langot and join the company of other like-minded wrestlers who have focused themselves on the task at hand. Be sure that the place for exercise is clearly demarcated, for it is no less important to define a place for exercise and physical training than for spiritual contemplation.
  3. Do not start off by over-exercising. Pace yourself so that you will not be exhausted.
  4. Regulate your exercise regimen by either counting the number of repetitions, or timing the duration of your workout. Only in this way will your body develop at a regular and consistent pace.
  5. Do not fall into the practice of exercising at irregular intervals. Exercise every day at the same time. 
  6. One should breathe deeply and steadily while exercising. Each exercise should be done to the rhythm of a single breath. Needless to say, one should breathe only through the nose.
  7. Beware of sweat. Oil your body before exercising. The oil will fill the pores and prevent rapid cooling.
  8. Focus your mind on each exercise. If your mind wanders you will not develop strength. Consider the laborer who works all day long. He is not as strong as the wrestler for he does not concentrate on his labor but thinks about other things.
  9. Do not sit down after exercising. Walk around to keep warm and loose. If you exercise inside, walk around inside. If you exercise outside, walk around outside.
  10. Get enough rest. Take one day off every week. Be asleep by eight in the evening.
  11. Do not exercise on either a full or empty stomach. Also do not exercise if you have not evacuated your bowels. Do not smoke or chew tobacco.
  12. Drink a glass of juice before exercising, and drink milk or some other tonic after exercising. This will help to focus your mind and relax your body.

A cursory glance at the list reveals that the Indians definitely know more about training than does, say, the Under Armor clad jackass on the preacher bench at your gym.  With a couple of exceptions, everything on this list falls directly in line with the precepts set forth by modern sports science and common sense.  In particular, I found number eight to be of interest, as I think the problem for most trainees is that they simply go through the motions without involving themselves fully in the exercise.  We’re all guilty of it from time to time, but true strength comes from focusing yourself completely on the exercise at hand- whether you train like Benny Podda, who used to psych himself up for a heavy lift by doing shit like running through walls and headbutting wall-mounted telephones across the room, then training til he bled out of his nose; you train utilizing a method about which I read in the 1990s wherein you train in total silence, without mirrors, so you have to focus intently on the task at hand and the biofeedback your body provides; or you go Ricky Bruch style, smashing lights out of the ceiling in celebration after a super intense set of leg raises, just being in the moment can have a profound effect on your training.

Pehlwans, having had a thousand years over which to figure out what the fuck is up, do their strength training in the afternoon, seven hours after their morning workout of running and wrestling.  This makes sense, as studies have shown that the best time of day to train for strength and hypertrophy is the evening (Guette and Scheet).  Other scientific studies have shown that morning workouts, particularly between 7AM and 9AM, are best for endurance workouts due to the fact that your body temperature is lower, and that your “body temperature, flexibility, physical strength, and speed all peak” between 3 and 7PM, when your respiration is best and pain tolerance is at its highest (Venton)  Their evening strength training workouts typically take three hours, after which they eat again, then sleep.  This falls perfectly in line with what science has told us is ideal, proving again that the Indians have a pretty good idea how to get strong and jacked.    The exercises that pehlwans utilize to develop their strength are far more varied than what most people think they’d be- our exposure to Indian strength training methods is generally limited to what Matt Furey has bandied about as “ancient, forgotten training methods”- namely, bodyweight exercises.  though they certainly play a central role, there’s more to Indian strength training than that.  With that stated, let’s check out what it is these fuckers are doing to pack on mass.

Surya Namaskar 

I covered this exercise in the previous installment, but to refresh your memory, it’s the unholy offspring produced when you combine a burpee and a dive-bomber pushup.  Don’t let the fact that yoga pussies do these- every epic motherfucker in India’s history did these like they were a Thai ladyboy giving out $5 blowjobs when the US Navy pulls into port.  We’re talking over a thousand a day if you want to be a hard motherfucker, which would suck worse than… getting a $5 blowjob from a Thai ladyboy (provided you’re not in the Navy, as they’re alleged to enjoy that sort of thing).

Dand

The dand is one of the most commonly used exercises in the Indian pantheon.  For those amongst you who’ve wrestled, you’ll recognize the dand as the dive-bomber pushup, or as the thing you had to do in practice when your coach wanted to punish you horribly for something.  In my experience, it was generally for insulting Jimmy Buffett, which happened more often than not, because Jimmy Buffett has porduced more godawful music than any other “musician” this side of Michael bolton.  If Jimmy Buffett were a woman, he’d be Rosanne- fat, ugly as sin, and boasting a voice that makes you wish you were deaf.   For those of you who’ve never done one of these, we’ll refer to Joseph Alter’s description for proper performance:

“One starts a dand from a face-down, prone position with feet placed close together and palms flat on the ground directly below the shoulders about half a meter apart. To begin, one cocks the body back by lifting one’s buttocks into the air while straightening both arms and legs (see figure 2). Bending at the elbows, one dives forward so that the chest glides between the palms close to the ground. One then arches up while straightening the arms and thrusting the pelvis down towards the ground. One then recocks the body to the starting position.”

These should be done daily, in ridiculous volume, and should be performed non-stop.  Once you’ve assumed the starting position, you should continue them until you’re finished.  Good wrestlers do over 2000 a day, and can do 1500 of them an hour, and the upper body specialists in India do over 5000 a day.  That, my friends, is fucking craziness.

It’s a goddamned shame this is what popped up when I googled bethak.

Bethak

Bethaks are what we all know as free squats.  They’re pretty easy to do, until you start to get into the type of volume for which the Indians are famous- we’re talking two to three thousand bethaks a day.  The fewest a pehlwan will do in a day is 500, which should tell you these guys are fucking serious about getting strong fucking legs.  For those of you who read the initial portions of this series, it’s not hard to imagine a guy like Monohar Aich getting a huge squat at a ridiculously low bodyweight after spending a couple of years in a British prison busting out thousands of free squats per day.  I don’t know that this will inspire me to start doing high rep squats a supplement to my basic routine, but Aich and his Indian buddies are at least making me consider the possibility.  If you’re interested in doing these correctly, you rock them like this:

“One starts a bethak from a standing position with feet set at forty-five degree angles and heels about fifteen to twenty centimeters apart. While squatting down one should jump slightly forward onto the balls of one’s feet while lifting the heels clear off the floor. In the process of standing back up, one should jump backwards to the position from which one started. One’s arms should be relaxed. They should sway with the movement of the body in order to maintain balance. One’s eyes should be fixed on a point about four meters forward on the ground, so that one’s head will be stationary and balanced”(Alter).

Lest you think you can get away with just throwing on some Hatebreed and crushing shit, you apparently cannot- shit has to be fully spiritual.  According to the oft-quoted Alter, “The most important feature of dands and bethaks is that they be done rhythmically and at a steady pace. The performance of thousands of these exercises produces a mental state not unlike that of a person who has gone into a trance through the rote recitation of a mantra or prayer. Thus, dands and bethaks transport the wrestler into an altered state of consciousness from which he derives psychic and spiritual purification. Vyayam is very much like meditation in this respect.”   

Joris and Gadas

Joris and gadas are weighted clubs and maces that Indians wrestlers and strength trainers swing to build upper body strength.  These implements are likely the reason Indian wrestlers have been renown for their grip, and the reason most Indian wrestlers you see have such wildly developed upper and lower arms.  The difference between the two is that joris are swung in pairs, while gadas are swung individually.  i was previously under the impression that jori were clubs and gadas were maces, but Joseph Alter, the only authority in the West I’ve been able to identify, has stated otherwise.

“At the beginning of the exercise, the joris are held in an inverted position. Each jori is swung alternately behind the back in a long arch. At the end of the arch each jori is lifted or flipped back onto the shoulder as the opposite jori begins its pendulum swing. Timing is an important part of this exercise. The balanced weight of one jori must facilitate the movement of the other. Jori swinging exercises the arms, shoulders, chest, thighs, and lower back. Wrestlers tend to swing fairly lightweight joris because they say that the heavier clubs cause the upper body to become rigid.
In contrast to the intricately carved silver and gold symbolic gadas (mace-like clubs) depicted in art and used as wrestling trophies, gadas used for everyday exercise are rather plain. An exercise gada is a heavy, round stone, weighing anywhere from ten to sixty kilograms, affixed to the end of a meter-long bamboo staff (see plate 4). The gada is swung in the same way as a jori except that only one gada is swung at a time. A gada may be swung with either hand or both hands at once.”

I’m certainly no authority on how you utilize these implements.  After watching the video I’ve posted after the break, I attempted to emulate the Sheik and failed miserably, utilizing 15 lb clubs.  If  you want to do it right, “The swing begins with the gada balanced on one shoulder. It is then lifted and shrugged off of the shoulder and swung in a long pendulum arch behind the back until it is flipped and lifted back onto the opposite shoulder. The gada is held erect for a split second before it is swung back in the opposite direction and onto the other shoulder” (Alter).  You count your reps in terms of the number of “hands” you can do, which are the full reps you complete with a given hand.  These aren’t done with the volume of dands and bethaks, but rather like you’d do a set of high-weight squats.  In other words, you do relatively low volume and focus on the weight lifted, rather than the reps completed.

Iron Sheikh challenges the future Ultimate Warrior to lift his Indian Clubs

Dhakuli

This is a common practice in every form of wrestling in which I have participated, and I’d imagine it’s endemic to all forms of wrestling due to their utility for wrestling- somersaults and flips.  Before you roll your eyes and move on, consider this- those of you who rarely stretch and don’t do any kind of sport involving flexibility would not enjoy a somersault at all.  It’d wrench the fuck out of your neck, be a hard, jerky movement, and would possibly make you vomit like you’re Linda Blair in the Exorcist.  Somersaults are awesome, however, for stretching out your spine and neck, loosening you up, getting in some weird cardio, and inuring you to motion sickness.  Pehlwanis have a wide variety of these, and they all involve twisting rotations that mimic the rotations they use to break an opponent’s grip.

Neck Work

In every masculine culture of which I’ve ever read, having a big neck is a sign of massive physical strength.  Given the paucity of 18″+ necks one sees in the West these days, we’ve pretty much abandoned that concept, but less “advanced cultures” still seem to value it- I don’t think I’ve ever seen a pencil-necked Maori, for instance.  To build up their necks, pehlwani utilize two methods- the bridge and the shirshasan (headstand).  They’re both exactly what you’d think- a basic wrestler’s bridge and your average headstand.  The latter is done for an amusing reason, however- it’s to increase the blood flow to one’s head, so as to remove impure thoughts.  Frankly, I would think that would just increase my depravity if I got more blood to my brain instead of my cock, but I’m also not Indian.

Nals

Nals are basically like Western free weights.  They’re large, cylindrical stones that are hollowed out and attached to a shaft of stone.  The generally weigh 30 kg., lest you think they’re some kind of bullshit baby wieght, and they’re designed to lift overhead in a smooth motion, like a porn star sliding a cock down her throat.

Gar Nals

These are circular stone rings used to increase the difficulty of dands and bethaks.  Most times, the gar nal will hang around a wrestler’s neck to add resistance for their exercises.  It’s said that only the most hard wrestlers utilize this method, not unlike the guys who utilize weighted vests to make the average workout awesome… not unlike myself.  Thus, these are reserved for the hardest of the hardcore.

After reviewing their methods, there’s little one can say to dispute their efficacy.  Though they might not be necessarily as useful as some more modern techniques, the training systems honed by the Indians over the last thousand years are clearly design to bring results.  I don’t think I’d encourage anyone to drop modern weightlifting techniques in favor of what the Indians use, but the utilization of some of the techniques, and the adoption of some of their less esoteric techniques and exercises would probably yield benefits far beyond most cookie-cutter weightlifting programs, and would at the very least renew one’s interest in training should they find it flagging.  Will it make you into a goddamned sexual Tyrannosaurus?   Likely not, especially given the Indians’ hilarious fear of blowing a load (which is a gigantic Santa Claus bag of craziness I omitted for brevity’s sake), but it might just be the little push you need to go from shit to suck, or suck to decent.

High five.

Sources:

Alter, Joseph.  The Wrestler’s Body: Identity and Ideology in North India.  California Scholarship Online.  12 May 1992.

Guette, M., Gondin, J., Martin, A. (2005). Time-of-day effect on the torque and neuromuscular properties of dominant and non-dominant quadriceps femoris. Chronobiology International, 22 (3): 541-58

McKay, Brett and Kate. 7 Health Benefits of a Cold Shower.  Art of Manliness.  18 Jan 2010.  Web.  4Jan 2013.  http://artofmanliness.com/2010/01/18/the-james-bond-shower-a-shot-of-cold-water-for-health-and-vitality/

Mujumdar, DC (ed.).  Encyclopedia of Indian Physical Culture.  1950.

Scheet, T. (2005). Effect of training time of day on body composition, muscular strength and endurance. National Strength and Conditioning Association Annual Meeting, Las Vegas.

Venton, Danielle.  Do the right things at the right time.  Wired.  Oct 2012.  Print.

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